Newly Separated. 2 Young Kids. 1 Bun In The Oven. A Business To Run.
How does a woman grow a successful business, be a fantastic mother, follow her dreams and live a full life without sacrificing something along the way?
To tell you the truth, right now, I have no idea.
What I do know though, is that for me, it just has to be done.
I’m a newly separated woman. I guess you can say that the sacrifice was my marriage.
But that’s another story.
This story, is how I plan on making it all work. I’ve always been a have my cake and eat it too kind of girl. I hate to choose between things if I want it all.
So being a business woman, a mother of 2 plus 1 on the way and just a woman who wants to live a full and exciting life, a plan has to be put in place.
Here it is so far…
1. Get Help
Without my own family here (in Perth, Australia) at my beck and call, I’ve had to hire help with some things I need done. Both for my business and life in general.
I have two young children, both boys, aged 6 and 15 months. They’re both very active, especially the toddler, he’s my cute ratbag.
With a business to run and things to do, there ain’t no time for cleaning. So I’ve hired a housekeeper to come in once a week and do a good clean of the whole house. Then during the week all I have to do is general tidying, picking up toys, dishes, some laundry (I save most of the laundry for the housekeeper) and vacuuming the never ending food trail around the house.
Cleaning isn’t as important to me as building my business, serving clients and making the money I need to actually keep a roof over our heads.
The other thing I’ve got help for is childcare. Even though I work from home and the main reason I started my business was to be able to be at home with the kids, having a day or two to myself to be able to get work done, to talk interruption free to clients or to record training videos or podcasts has been fan-frikken-tastic.
The next thing (well, actually this was the first) I got help with was with the admin and technical tasks of running a business. I hired a VA pretty much from day dot. She’s been a God-send and has really helped me free up a lot of my time so I am spending less time on admin tasks and more time in my Zone of Genius – creating, writing and serving clients.
One of the best investments I’ve made in the getting help department is on my life and mindset coaches. I needed to get my mind right and talk to someone about getting my life in order. Someone that would be able to help me move through any bad patches and start feeling good again.
Next phase of help: A nanny/housekeeper in one. I have a cunning plan to get my mum over here to do that for me (she lives in New Zealand, where I’m originally from).
2. Plan In Advance
I love to plan.
It’s a side-effect from being a huge daydreamer since I was wee little girl. Heck, I love daydreaming so much and planning out my life and business that I wrote a book about daydreaming (The Daydreamer’s Guide To Business: How To Plan Your Dream Business And Make It A Reality).
When I knew that it was time to leave my husband, I planned out exactly what I needed to do and how I needed to do it in order to survive.
Both emotionally, physically and financially.
I planned out the activities I would take up outside of the family and my business, I planned out my finances and how I was going to meet the targets I set for myself, I even planned out a general plan on what I was going to be doing every day, every week.
Meal planning was another thing I wanted to start doing. So I looked up slow cooker recipes, went shopping and prepared at least a week’s worth of dinners for the kids and I in a couple hours. It’s awesome being able to pull a freezer bag of food out of the freezer and know that all I needed to do was empty it (thawed) into the slow cooker in the morning and dinner was done.
Next phase of planning: Get into more detail of what my days will look like when the new baby is here.
3. Put Yourself First
As a mother, let alone a single mother, it’s a hard idea to grasp that you should put yourself first. Your first instinct is to always just make sure the kids are happy, and that’s OK. But when you’re doing that at the expense of your own happiness and sanity, in the long run, it’s not a good move for anyone.
If mama’s happy, baby’s happy.
Looking after myself and making sure that I’ve slept, I’ve eaten and that I’m getting everything I need in order to function properly as a human being, a mother and a coach for clients has been imperative to keeping my sanity and feeling good every day.
If I kept operating at the 30% mark because I was always tired and grumpy, the kids would not have a good time hanging with mum, clients would start complaining, and everything would just crumble.
You have to do things that are good for you, that make you happy and that keep you operating on a high vibrational level. When you feel yourself dipping, it’s time to figure out what you can do that makes you feel good and do more of that.
Next phase of putting myself first: Go to bed earlier than midnight. Stop working so damn late.
So those are the 3 things that I’m focusing on, and will continue focusing on as I continue my journey as an entrepreneur, mother and human being.
I may stuff up every now and then, but I know that as long as I keep focused on the dream life that I desire for myself and my children, all will be well.
About The Author:
Phillipa Kiripatea is a marketing coach for entrepreneurs who love to dream big. Through her free mastermind group, The League of Women Who #DreamBig she inspires and motivates women to dream bigger and to make their big dreams a reality.
Phillipa believes in enlightened connection and speaking your truth. She hates small talk. Loves vulnerability.